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(Saturday) Thank you for giving me a place in your mind

I've noticed something rather annoying recently. The use of the word "we" is starting to seriously p#ss me off. No one is allowed to speak on my behalf unless they have express written permission from me, signed in triplicate, stamped twice and enclosed with the family seal. This includes people who write adverts for AOL and opinion pieces in newspapers and magazines.

There's an advert for AOL that goes something along the lines of Orwell was wrong, they don't control things - 'we' do. Right. Who's this 'we'. Are we talking about AOL the company here? Or we as in me and the bloke who wrote the advert? Or perhaps it's a 'we' which frankly has no place in that advert.

The worst offenders are people who write opinion collumns. There's a bloke who writes one in a magazine called Psychologies magazine who wrote a terrible article about how 'we' project our own lives onto those of the celebrity set. He wrote about how "we" really need to stop it and that the level of attention "we" focus on celebrities is unhealthy.

What this bloke actually means here is you. As in, you lot. You horrible scrotes 'out there'. What he fails to understand is that this is an illusion. The people he's chiding do not exist. Furthermore if I decide not to let him speak on my behalf and re-write the article it becomes quite a tragic confessional as his sentences dissolve into statements like this: 'I' project my own life onto those of the celebrity set. "I" really need to stop it, the level of attention "I" focus on celebrities is unhealthy.*

It's a more interesting article but I think he'd be upset if he realised what a sprout it makes him sound like.

NM

Doctors is closed all weekend. Will sort it monday.

*This is a fun game by the way. Take an opinion piece and re-write it changing the word 'we' to I. If you have any particularly good successes with this please email them over. I like getting good emails to this site. Nick@hallamfm.co.uk - subject 'weblog'.

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