(Sunday) Captain spack attack

A while ago I bemoaned my pathetic nature on this 'blog and the fact I never complain about anything ever. Ever. Well rarely at least. Two thing happened this weekend that worried me as regards this element of my character. Firstly I watched smug mind control expert Derren Brown on telly. He turned four dorky di#kweeds into opportunistic bank robbers. Actually, check that. I think it was 3 of them that actually cracked and one didn't bother. I was bemused by the programme in places. As usual it wasn't really explained properly. When one of them made the robbery I felt like somewhere along the line like I'd missed a meeting or something.

Anyway, part of it included a reference to the Milgram experiment which was an experiement where people in a cotrolled environment are told to electrocute another human each time they get a question wrong. The end reuslt is this human dies, or appears to. Look it up via the link if that explanation is as clear as dogs#it.

Anyway it represents the level to which silly humans like me are happy to respect authority and compromise our moral instincts. It worries me that I may be one of the flaccid little pric#s who'd go kill a guy just because some geezer in a white coat told me to. I think it's the same instinct that stops me from complaining about things.

In this programme Derren Brown selected dour people like me because we're easy to manipulate. He could get them to rob a bank. And they did. Does this mean I'd be a bank robber type as well?

Me and my little lady are sat in the cinema. There's about 20 or 30 people in there. We're watching the new Woody Allen film "Match Point"*. There's a horrible bass rumble. The sound is clearly bugge#ed. So what do I and my fellow humans do about it? Nothing. We sit there. We've all paid to get in but no one complains. Stupid. They're all potential bank robbers!

Or at least that's how the story would have gone if it wasn't for my plucky girlfriend. She went and sorted it out. One in 20. Madness. She's from Liverpool.

What I'm not sure about is this. I'm a wimp - does that make me a potential bank robber? What about my girlfriend (from Liverpool remember) she's the plucky complaining type. She's happy to challenge authority in the right circumstances. Wouldn't she be more likely to rob a bank?

At Leeds train station recently - got sent from one WHSmiths to another with a book in my hand that I hadn't paid for.

"Go buy it in the one over there" said the assistant; "Take it with you and use their till, mines broken".

So I walked out of that shop. Book in hand. Walked all the way over to the other WHSmith. Book in hand. Could have gone to get the train and not bothered paying. Didn't do that. Queued up and paid for the book. Absurd.


Tonight is my last night with my athlete's foot. I've been told it's either that or my girlfriend gets out the old junior hacksaw!

*Very good. Go see. If I review it too much I'll ruin it. Only thing in there that slightly jars is James Nesbit's (the bloke off the Yellow Pages advert) appearance. I kept expecting him to order something out of Yellow Pages. Actors who do adverts are very hard to take seriously. Another person who I can't stand because of an advert is Adam Hart Davis. "Tax doesn't have to be taxing!" he chirps like an annoying teacher who you never managed to learn anything off. Used to like him, can't now. He's revealed himself as a twonk.


Popular Posts