Cover your eyes in the light of the stars and sing, sing, sing!

This may look like the sort of entry that's written by an old man who is getting more and more disgusted by the nation's youth. It may look like that but it's not. I'll explain why as I go along. Suffice it to say I've always hated the human race. We're filthy f#cking disgusting horrible creatures who are only really fit to be laughed at most of the time. We've achieved nothing of any worth in the short length of time we've been here. We're too wrapped up in our own quarrells and greed.*

I've never liked lads between the ages of 14-18. I don't know why. I always want to tell them to 'f#ck off and show some respect'. Doesn't matter if they deserve that or not. Being essentially mild mannered and sane I don't go swearing at strangers but y'know it's a half-thought. Most of them look like they need a good kicking.

When I say never I mean that in the truest possible sense I can. As a young kid I didn't like them. Often because I was scared of them. They were the horrible "bigger boys" who'd kick you or smack you for no reason. Survival instinct made me fear them. Then when I was 14-18 and they were my peers I had to put up with their nonsense. I also had to endure a certain ammount of self-loathing. As a result I chose to hang out with quite a select few people. It was hard finding anyone worth talking to at that age.

Now I just look in disgust whenever for any reason I'm confronted by them.

Stood as I was in Hillsborough on the Friday about to get the tram** I was amazed at how little things have improved amongst this strange group of people. Drugged up on hormones they were loafing along in the way lads do. Covered in spots, skin as greasy as a chip and hair shocked into the oddest cuts you've seen. Then one of them made me want to kill him.

"Hock - sshpit"

Dirty little c#nt spat on the floor? What's that about? I haven't seen one do that for years. Like, 20 years ago kids used to do that. It seemed to die out though as I came to that age. Has it come back into fashion? He wasn't suffering from a respiratory or digestive problem. He was doing it to show what a f#cking dude he was. Why? It makes no sense. Why?


Puberty is a terrible thing. The sooner they work out how to do without it and we're born as adults the better. I've no idea how I'd cope if I had a lad of my own that age. I'd have to disown him for 5 years or so.


It's becoming an annoyance now. I'm waking up in the morning anxious to scratch it. This simply isn't possible if the lady is in the bed. It's like I'm having an affair with my fungus infected foot. I can't explain to you how much sweet pleasure it is to scratch it. However if we extend the affair analogy I need to get rid. It itching so often is like it calling at inconvinient times. I've got to get it sorted. Soon. Just not yet. Itchy time again!

*It's possible to hold this view and the exact opposite at the same time. I don't know how but I'm living proof of this fact. I equally understand that humans are all unique beautiful intricate fascinating jewels of love. Multi-layered facets of the universe's developing process of consciousness, self awareness and ultimately of course its divinity. Go deal with that nonsense. It makes sense.

**How f#cking great is the tram? Very, that's how fuc#ing great it is. Cheaper than a bus. Nicer. Less full of t#ats.


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