Bloody hell. I'm so sorry if I've misled you recently with my postings about The Zumebar in Manchester. Don't misunderstand me, it's a great club, but it's not as good as The Lescar. The Lescar must surely be one of the best comedy clubs in the UK. The first time I ever went there, I remember it so clearly, I was a bit worried at the price. It seemed a little steep to watch some people talking rubbish. Still I thought, I'd have a go and see what it was like.
That night I watched Simon Blythe rip the room up into the sort of laughter where you can't actually breathe because you're laughing so much. Added to this was Toby Foster the compare who was clearly naturally funny.
I was hooked.
I'd been to a few stand-up gigs before. I'd even had a go at a few open mic spots but to be honest with you I hadn't really caught "the bug". I'd got a watered down version of it from the telly. In fact, if you extend the metaphor, you could almost say I'd been innoculated. By watching it on telly I thought I knew about and had seen "live comedy". What an utter f#cknut I'd been.
You can't explain to someone who has never dabbled in watching proper, good, live comedy how great it is. All they've got to go on is what they've seen on the telly.
And that's a bit like thinking you know all about sex once you've watched a porn video.*
You don't. You can't. Thing is it's possible to go to see s#it live comedy and then think - what the f#ck is everyone talking about? This live comedy thing is rubbish. No it's not. It's great.
The acts I saw last night were Anvil Springsteen** and Ian Moore. The latter was the funnier of the two. He dished out some beautiful smackdowns to a couple of di#ks at the front who kept talking during his set. Beautiful.
All I'm saying is, if you get the chance to go somewhere like The Lescar, go!
*Oh dear. I've just remembered a mate of mine once told me that was why he watched porn. To improve his skills. I pity his future girlfriends! Just so long as they've always got a clean face flannel I suppose they'll be okay.
**He was fantastic. He did some really edgy f#cked up material about The Queen which had me crying with laughter. Some of the crowd looked genuinely shocked, a good look to see on people's faces in such situations.