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thecultofnick

Ship inshide tish house

It's the middle of the night, actually no, it's the morning. It's 3am. I'm on air in six hours, standing in for Daryl. This means I'll have to be up and out of bed for around seven. At best I'll get four hours sleep. That's not going to happen. The insomnia is at its absolute peak. In antricipation of this, yesterday I took some sleeping pills and went to sleep at an early time. The idea was to get my sleeping clock timed in nicely for today. No such luck. They knocked me for six and I slept like a corpse through 'til 2pm. Now I'm trying to get to sleep and it's not happening. I've got stupid thoughts going through my head about my career, the state of the world, the rise of facism. You know, the usual bollo~ks.

Partly I think I'm nervous about standing in for Daryl during the day. Although I used to present a show on Hallam FM during the day for quite some time in the past nowadays I seem to get overlooked for cover work. As a result it feels like a big deal and so I get nervous about f#cking it all up.

That's not the real reason I can't sleep though. The real reason is when my head is on the pillow it's hard to keep my eyes shut. It doesn't feel natural. I can't turn my brain off either. It's prattling away about any topic it likes while I'm trying to sleep. The real reason I can't sleep is because I have insomnia. It's an illness. It's a f#cking pain in the ar#e.

There's no way I'm taking any of those pills again though. They absolutely f#cked me for hours, I'd never wake up in time for the show. I'd be out cold or at best really groggy and stupid while I stood in for Daryl. Ye Gods!

NM

2 comments:

John Szram said...

Hi Nick, insomnia & I are long time bed fellows (pun most definitely intended). It's 5:16 am and I'm still nursing a slight headache from Guinness topped with Double Tia Maria. It's your fault, you've got me hooked! Anyway, had to get an extra beer in as it's yer dad's birthday. Was introduced to Lucy & her boyfriend this evening (outnumbered by Scots yet again!) & was trying desperately to remember if I've met your sister before?! Maybe when we were kids? Very bonny lassie, don't tell her I said that though ok?

I'm on holiday and typically when you don't go away you end up doing more than you would if you were actually working. Mike's just purchased himself a computer & I've been his buyer/delivery boy/wireless network installer & technical support over the past few days. He's been dragged kicking & screaming into the 21st century & joins those other 2 silver surfers at the table. Meanwhile, I've been trying to decorate and failing miserably as I keep getting dragged away. Nice to be popular huh? I started painting my ceiling at midnight last night, finished around 6am (Well...it's a big room!) and slept the day away. Consequently I'm caught in the same trap as yourself lying in bed & head buzzing with random stuff. Fortunately I can muse over your old audio phone-in's. Particularly enjoyed the cycling one.

Anyway, sorry for rambling. Hope you get some sleep & it all goes well tomorrow. You'll breeze through it. You're a star!

As for insomnia, I wouldn't have it any other way. Proud to be a thinker right?

Stay in touch & stay off them pills.

Cheers, John.

Nicholarse said...

Hard to tell if the above is ment as an email... if so, erm, I can delete it I think.

Good to hear from you man. Tia Maria and Guinness it's the future! Brutal though. Very brutal.

NM

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