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Is that really justice?

I got a letter off my gym* today explaining that my complimentary membership was due to be cancelled unless I can 'maximise their financial marketability profit margin'. I've no idea what the crunk that means but there's a number to call at the bottom of the letter so I'll give them a buzz on Monday. I'm not really very good at 'blagging'** things and free gym membership is one of the few things I get out of the fact that I'm a Z-list celebrity*** in South Yorkshire.

This is annoying because I recently bought one of them there ipod/walkmen/mp3 thingys. I was looking forward to using the gym while I listened to the various podcasts and songs I've managed to squeeze onto it. Hopefully I can convince them their gym is adequately rewarded by its association with The Nick Margerrison Brand. Wish me luck.

In other news I was dissapointed to turn up to Zumeba Comedy club in Manchester only to be greeted with the news that it was closed for the next month or so. Doubly so, given that I'd had an email today telling me what a great show it was going to be tonight. Obviously there was some sort of mix up. However I loved the fact that there was a little table of people sat there at the back of the room, visible to all of us outside through the glass doors. They were laughing and eating food having some sort of little party every now and then looking at us like the fools we were beckoning us to go away.

"Ha - can't they read? The little sign says we're closed. Don't go and explain to them, just ignore them, they'll go away."

People are brilliant.

NM

*Not going to name them until this fiasco is resolved.

**Partially due to my hatered of that word. Surely a word used exclusively by c#nts? Does that make me a cu#t? Probably in this instance it does. Shame. I appear to be in a hole of my own making. No pun. Erm...

***A good mate of mine once explained to me that radio DJs are right at the bottom of the showbiz ladder. Just above jugglers and That Fat Lad Who was on Pop Idol.

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