This thing be automatic (Tuesday)

I'm going on the atkins diet. If I get weighed tomorrow and I've not lost some weight I am going to go on the atkins diet again and actually burn off some of this jabber which clings to my frame. I've been sticking to weight watchers and no losing any weight. It's been going up a couple of pounds and then down a couple of pounds. That's it. My weight loss has hit a total flatline. I have about two stone left to lose and frankly it's never going to happen with this system. I need to take drastic action.

I feel a little bit like the tubby woman who was kicking off at the leader of the group some time ago as she stood on the scales*. She was f#cking livid that she'd not lost any weight. I can remember stifling my mirth as her chubby face got more and more angry;

"I've dun alt things wot yuv said an it ant wurked".

She spluttered. How amusing I found this at the time. "Ha ha, stop eating pies fatty," went my gloating mind. Now I find myself in her shoes. Looking at my pregnant stomach and wondering why it won't shrink.

The Atkins works. It's just brutal. Tomorrow I'll find out if I'm going back on it. Anything less than three pounds off and I am.


*I've just spent the best part of an hour looking through this blog to see if I can find my original post about her. I couldn't. Two things struck me as I looked. Firstly I'm surprised at how many posts I've actually got on this blog, it doesn't feel like such a long time ago since I started it but we're coming up to a years worth of stuff now. Secondly I noticed how easy it is to get distracted on the internet. I've just wasted about an hour catching up with how I used to feel about stuff. Sort of listening to an older version of me prattling on about what their life is like in the past. It's an odd world. Apparently we will soon be able to send and recieve messages from the past. Something called retrocausality. What do you think of that? Madness. That's what I think. F#cking madness.


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