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thecultofnick

There's not enough agressive lorry drivers on the motorway these days.

I was at a party this weekend and I got into one of those brilliant (but very rare) conversations you get into at parties where there's wine and booze. It ended up with me reading out a quote to my two conversationalists from my phone;

"The earth is a giant foetus which is gradually becoming one consciousness. Its gestation period was around 4.5 million years. Now the internet spreads out over the earth creating the brain of this huge organism. One half of the planets electricity is generated for use by computers which are connected to it. In 2012 once the apocalypse is complete it inevitably becomes self aware."

Now, this is not all my own work. It's an approximation of the ideas of Terrence McKenna and various other fringe philosophers. If you're into the idea go and look at the podcasts you can get from The Psychedelic Salon which are in my sidebar. It was great though, to talk to people about these ideas and find others who are interested and who don't just shrug and pull a face that says "f#cking moron".

I'm exactly the sort of person that often happens to a lot. I find I have to put out a few feelers first to see if people are prepared to talk about the more esoteric side of life. It's not unusual for me to be the only person interested in what I have to say; "yeah, so maybe like, we're all from the future, lying there watching our lives before we die, eh lads? Lads? Doh.".

Maybe that's what will happen tomorrow. I'll be the only person talking in the room as everyone else just ignores me and makes their own fun. No. Positive attitude. I'm going to Beat That Frog. I am going to Beat That F#cking Frog!*

NM

*Beat The Frog. It's one of the North Of England's toughest comedy Gong shows. If you're sh#t you get booed off the stage. If you manage to last 5 minutes you have Beat The Frog and get a round of applause.

2 comments:

Leather Face said...

LOL It's good to know I'm not the only one who puts out these feelers before going into the psychedlic world which transpires in my brain :0)

Fortunately or unfortunately (I can't decide) I have friends who are into the strange and wonderfull side of life and I have friends who are into the mundane and controlled side of life. Whom's life is wasted? None if thats what they enjoy.

Yesmans said...

Now then, you need to amend your gestation period the age of the earth is actually 4.6 Billion Years, this means if you translate the age of the earth to the age of a person it'd be say 46 year old middle aged man.
The oceans formed 42 years ago; the first replicating molecules appeared 40 years ago, when Earth was 6; the first cell at 11; primitive photosynthesis occurred when Earth was 19 - late developer; leading to the oxygen catastrophe at 22; the earth was still in a tumultuous state suffering two high speed impacts at 26 and 28 and not settling down with a good Ozone layer until 41, just at the time the first vertebrates appeared. Then at 42 Earth decided to have a mid-life crisis with the Cambrian mass extinction, but this sparked the real rise in productivity with plants colonizing the land and the first arthropods appearing. Amphibians pulled themselves onto the land only 3 years and 9 months ago, shortly followed by plants with seeds to really spread across the planet. Then after another wobble at 44 which shed 95% of all species, clearing the way for the first dinosaurs only 2 years 3 months ago and reigned through the evolution of the first birds 1 and half years ago and the first flowers 1 year 3 months, before being wiped out in the Yucatan Asteroid collision only 7 months ago. Less than a week later, the common ancestor of the primates appeared, with the apes popping up 22 days ago. From then on Earth finally got a bug up her arse, with homo erectus climbing down from the trees in the last week and humans establishing themselves as top dog 3 days ago; in the last 17 hours cave art appeared and we've been farming the land for the last half hour. Christianity has been around for 10 minutes 31 seconds, the renaissance happened 3 minutes 41 seconds ago and the industrial revolution took hold just over a minute ago. The first computer appeared in the last 15 seconds, connecting together to form the www in just 12 seconds.
If 2012 is the big one, Earth did a lot of pissing about before she became self aware.

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