"God is a concept, by which we measure our pain" - J.Lennon

5th June

If everyone in the middle east woke up an atheist tomorrow I think the problems in that area could probably be sorted out within a few weeks. As far as I'm aware that section of the earth is one which various people think God has promised them as a gift. With God on their side people can often become very unreasonable.

"They should sort it out like my Mum used to with cake, one of you divides it in half and the other gets to choose" - Richard Herring.

The annoying thing for me about the problems in the middle east is that we're involved at all. I actually could not care less. If I were the boss of the UK my foreign policy would be real simple. I'd wash my hands and then wish both sides the best of luck.

As regular readers may be aware I don't travel much*. My ill-informed opinion of the rest of the world is thus: all a big horrible messy mud pit with people squirming about on the floor crying and pointing back towards me as they squeal "ahh - I'm in an awful situation thanks to you and your ancestors!".

I voiced this opinion to a mate of mine who is Jewish recently and he assured me that I had it all wrong, "You must come with me to Tel Aviv some time man, it's beautiful". I remember pointing out that the middle east is exactly the sort of place that gives fuel to my prejudices so he laughed and said, "well at least come over to America next year, there's nothing like that there". Err, Native Americans might disagree. "Australia?" - Aborigines?

There really don't seem to be many countries we haven't smacked about in the past at some point or other.

That and the fact I'm lazy tend to get in the way of me travelling about with my English accent.

However, given that this attitude drives my girlfriend up the wall (and over it to freedom if I'm not careful) I'm actually planning to do a little bit of travel this year. I go to Dublin soon for my mate's 30th. Does that count as travel? I'm also going to Amsterdam again soon. Should be fun. I've got a bit of a hazy memory of it from last time round so it'll be a whole new experience for me, again.

NM

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