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Brand Russell Ltd

08 July

I spent the evening watching Brand Russell re-creating 'On the road' with my girlfriend. I want to like this bloke but I've not managed to yet. Everything about him is bang on target for me and my peculiar tastes. He likes David Icke, he's mates with Noel Gallagher, he looks cool, he's clearly into half arsed mysticism. I think I'd probably get on with him*. He just irritates the crap out of me and makes me want to shout "oh just f___ off you unfunny b_____d!" over and over again until my throat turns itself inside out.

I think I'd be able to get behind him more if he wasn't billed as a comedian. He doesn't make me laugh, at all. Apart from once on some clip show or other where he'd clearly had someone write him a funny joke or something and I laughed. I'll be honest with you, I was as surprised as anybody else when it happened.

I think there's an element of jealousy in the way, I'm man enough to admit that. My girlfriend clearly fancies the pants off him and he has ploughed his way through a lot of very keen ladies aside from Andrew Sachs' granddaughter**.

I've also had the dubious honour of watching him do stand up pre-fame. From the description he gives of his work it's clearly him I remember dicking about with hunks of meat in a comedy club years ago. He was rubbish but gave the impression he thought he was a genius. I then watched him just before the whole thing took off in Glastonbury. He still had long rubbish curtain hair and was still unfunny but the audience dug him more.

Like I said, I actually do want to like him. It's just never quite clicked for me. I think the fact he's a football fan puts me off as well. It makes me think all the other stuff which makes me want to like him is naught but a carefully planned pose and that I on the edges of a demographic web.

Also there are enormous stylistic simmilarities between him and the comedian Paul Foot with whom Brand Russell is friends. One significant difference between them is that Paul Foot is hilarious and a genius whereas Brand Russell seems a bit contrived. I'm not saying one has copied the other but I am saying Paul Foot strikes me as wholly original.

NM

*I worry about things like this nowadays. It's unlikely we'd ever be friends but imagine if a strange series of odd co-incidences actually conspired to allow that. Then play the scenario out further and the two of us get along so famously that a real bond is forged. Then one day he discovers his new great mate Nick Marwhatchamacallit has a blog. "Oooh - might have a read" he thinks. Lands on this entry. Friendship over.

**She came on our Kerrang show with her mates, The Satanic Sluts. I think I dished out a bit of criticism towards Brand Russell during that show. Can't remember. Perhaps that's one for the podcast?

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